THE NAKED TRUTH

The marble mart runs along a busy, dusty, no-man’s land between Delhi and Gurgaon, where ochre winds blow and the sun shines low… Yesterday, I went there looking for a shade for the floor, and as I walked past row upon row of marble slabs of varied hues, I saw something move… I stopped, stepped back and looked again… it was one of the oddest things I’d ever seen… On the floor, sat a man; bespectacled, in his 20s, reading from a piece of paper… that isn’t very odd you’d say… but what if I told you that the man was buck naked… And he wasn’t alone. Next to him sat three other men, all of them without a stitch on them… Hoping they wouldn’t notice, I inched forward, past a corridor of neatly stacked slabs and even without meaning to, stared… Next to those nudes in repose sat a throng of women, some in white saris and the rest in everyday clothes… One of the naked men was much older than the one I had first seen… he must’ve been in his 70s; he waved towards me and signaled for me to come forward… I wondered if I’d upset him but his serene expression told me that he had endured such nosy parkers before… I sat down in front of him…

“Maharaj Bahubaliji is a living god. He’s a Digamber (sky clad) Jain saint”, whispered a devotee in my ear. Sitting next to me, hunched over his knee, he smiled at me and then prostrated himself in front of the naked old man. “He has renounced all worldly possessions and therefore has nothing, not even a piece of cloth to cover him. He and his disciples don’t wear clothes (the women cover themselves with a single piece of coarse cloth), eat strictly vegetarian food, and only once a day, don’t ever use medicines, are strict celibates, never use any form of transport other than their own two feet, don’t use any form of modern communication, never accept any monetary or any other offering other than their food for the day, pull their hair out strand by strand each time it grows and don’t have any form of permanent residence… the world indeed is their home.” Bahubali Maharaj smiled and nodded. “But we don’t eat at all if at the time we’re about to eat, we hear the sound of another creature in distress. How can I eat when another soul is suffering? The whole objective of living the way we do is to ensure that we live our life without ever hurting any creature, through words, actions or even thoughts”, he said.

Now, I don’t know if I’m echoing your own thoughts dear readers, but while I can find inspiration in every aspect of such an ascetic’s life, I find it impossible to understand the vow of celibacy. Why choose not to love? “Kyunki isse moh badtha hai…,” said Sugyani Mata, a female disciple. “It increases attachment, and non-attachment is the only way to conquer sorrow…” Then what of the attachment between a guru and disciple, between fellow disciples… “That is shudha, pure, because it does not add to the sansara, and because it isn’t exclusionary and such love, therefore, does not have the potential to add to one’s sorrows”. So, if the nature of love does not add numbers to the world’s population and is inclusive, is it ok? I wondered… for that ushered in a whole host of questions, which I didn’t have the courage to ask. There was such a strong aura of calm benevolence around the saint that I knew he would happily answer any question I asked of him, but I wasn’t too sure about the devotees around him, and that brought me to my next question… What did he think about the extreme religious intolerance of our times? “My faith is mine alone”, he said “and even if you kill me, you can’t take my faith away from me. But what good is a non-violent faith if I choose to use violence for the right to practice my faith of non-violence. My relationship with my God is mine alone and since it is an internal bond, no one can stop me from practicing it. What is the point of losing the essence of a faith, by fighting over its symbols.” I felt humbled in his presence…

“Those aren’t mere words”, said one of his disciples, incidentally the same naked figure that had first drawn my attention. “Guruji was leading a band of 30 disciples through a forest near Gaya in Bihar some years back. It was dusk and we still had about three kilometres to go when a band of dacoits ambushed us. They beat up some of the disciples and then aimed their handguns at them. Guruji walked up and stood between the guns and his disciples and asked why we’d been stopped. The dacoits wanted our belongings and a ransom of five lakh rupees. Guruji smiled and said that they had nothing and no one... The dacoits wanted to detain us. So Guruji told us to take a vow of silence and sit down. After hours of waiting, the dacoits got tired of us and told us to turn back but Guruji said that there was no question of us turning back… we would only move forward, to which the dacoits said that they would shoot and kill us if we refused to turn back. Guruji said that they could kill us if they wanted to but we would only move forward. Stunned and humbled by his calm strength, the dacoits grew penitent and apologised for their sins. Then they themselves escorted us for the remaining three kilometres and asked for forgiveness again and again before they left.” I looked up at Guruji who just smiled and said “Tyaag mein shakti hai… there is great strength in surrender and sacrifice.”

It was almost dusk and Guruji requested that he be excused. He takes a vow of silence after sun-set. But I still had many unanswered questions and so I approached two of his disciples. One, about 65-years-old, was prostrating himself in front of another who seemed to be in his 20s. The younger man apparently had become a monk when he was merely 14-years-old. I wanted to know why… He’s called Sidha Sain today but his name was Ashok Tarunappa once, he said. And he was your regular teenaged lad who loved playing kabaddi and cricket and driving the tractor in his village near Hubli in Karnataka. Then one day, Bahubali Maharaj arrived at his village and stayed there for four months under a tree… the little boy was fascinated by the simplicity and serenity of the saint and did not realise when he was transformed from a happy-go-lucky kid into a passionate believer in the path of sanyaas. The day Bahubali Maharaj left the village, young Ashok ran after him and begged him to accept him as his disciple. Guruji refused saying the path is very difficult but the boy persisted. His parents, hurt and saddened, couldn’t stop crying, but they did not want to stand in the way of their child’s divine destiny… so when Guruji accepted him, little Ashok became Sidha Sain. “But you’re so young… don’t you feel tempted by the world,” I asked. “Sometimes… (he hesitated) sometimes I get dreams… but then I do penance and practice austerities… the idea is to conquer the mind”. “And death…,” I asked. “Death doesn’t need conquering… it is liberation… whether mine or that of someone one loves, remember ‘tis only a gateway…” I learnt that the older man had only been a monk for six months and therefore was the lowest ranked disciple. Though he’d tried joining Guruji earlier, his moh for his parents, wife or his children pulled him back… but this time he had made up his mind. “Doesn’t your wife feel you are running away from your responsibilities,” I asked. “I’m almost 70”, he said in fluent English… “and I’ve spent my whole life living for others. Now I want to spend all that remains of it communing with the Almighty. I have a business which’ll take care of their material needs and most of my children are married and well settled… so this time, I’m not going back.”

I had been talking to them for a while and I started getting frantic calls from my wife, inquiring if I too was “planning to run away with them?”. So I paid my respects and left, called my wife and told her to relax, because this path wasn’t for me, but my mind kept going back to the one thing that Guru Bahubali Maharaj had said and something I’d always believed and hoped was true… that “human beings were born to be God-like, to have power over our destinies, with a clear understanding of joy and sorrow, of birth and death, and the nature of it too” and while he might feel that the renunciate’s path is the way to godliness, I for now don’t know for sure… Guess we’ll all find the path as long as we believe in the possibility… all the best to you in your quest for godliness…

THE DUEL

Ok folks… I’m a little pressed for time this week, so you must forgive me for this abrupt start. You see I’m ‘in training’ and on the line are thousands of lives and one man’s soul. If I win, I save them all, and if I lose, I forfeit my honour along with the rest.

Here’s the prologue…

Some of you might recall a piece I’d written sometime back about the ethics of vegetarianism and, god bless ‘em, some readers actually wrote back claiming they’d turned vegetarian after reading the article. Among them was a dear friend from school… let’s call him RC (‘a lot more full-bodied than the bottled version’, was how one of his lady-friends had described him on graduation day). Now, RC’s a man with a heart of gold. He’s kind and generous, upright and honest and has the integrity of a slab of granite… a man you can lean on if you ever need support. Now, if the description so far suggests that he’s a bit of a good-natured simpleton, the truth is he’s far from it… For starters, he’s built like a Baywatch life-guard who’s too tired to swim… you know, handsome, chiseled features, a broad muscular chest and shoulders, but with a little inflated tube around the middle… nevertheless, you just know that there’s a rock-hard six pack hiding in there somewhere… And with wit and charm to boot, he’s quite a personable chap to hang out with… So, when he told me he’d given up eating meat, I was really happy, for him, because he would be free from the karmic debt of taking lives to pleasure his palate, and for the countless lives that might live a day longer because there is one man less demanding his pound of flesh for the next 70 odd years… the pen, I thought, might indeed prove mightier than the sword.

But what good is a happy ending without a twist in the tale; and so I met him at a food court for one of our lets-meet-up sessions, just in time to catch him devouring chicken wings… a common female friend of ours had once described him as “ohh! He’s such an animal”, and I’d wondered why… but looking at the ketchup splattered plate, mouth and fingers, I concluded she must’ve seen him eat… “What gives, RC? ...back to meat?”, I asked. “uh?”, I seemed to have startled him. “…Oh, it’s you!”, he looked sheepish, almost apologetic… “I tried so hard you know… I swear, didn’t eat it for weeks, but then every time I’d go to the gym, I’d feel so weak… without all that animal protein, I could feel all that hard-earned muscle wasting away… I couldn’t let that happen, you understand, na…”. Of course, I didn’t understand. “It’s just a psychological overreaction, RC. You don’t need meat to stay strong and healthy. Remember that show we saw on TV (“The Wheel of Life”, Star World) about those Shaolin monks. They’re vegans but didn’t you see them break rocks, balance their body on one finger and perform those amazing feats of strength? You don’t need meat, trust me…” RC was adamant. “No yaar, I’m not convinced. Every strong, well-built guy I know swears by chicken breasts. Show me a vegetarian who fits that bill, and I’ll go back to being a vegan.” I thought about the challenge for a while and then found inspiration in the extraordinary life of a 78-year-old man from New Jersey, called Herb Kelleher. Now Herb is the former chairman of Southwest Airlines who I had read about while in B-school and the bit I remembered most about him was an event called ‘Malice in Dallas’. The story goes thus - Herb’s Southwest had unknowingly begun using a slogan that was very similar to that of another aviation company’s – Stevens Aviation. When Stevens brought it to Southwest’s notice, the companies decided that instead of paying heaps of money to their lawyers to resolve the dispute, the two Chairmen would settle the dispute over a best of three series of arm wrestling matches. In the end, irrespective of who won, both companies enjoyed unprecedented publicity and every one was happy. Thus inspired, I threw down the gauntlet and told RC, “so you think that generally speaking, vegans aren’t nearly as strong as meat eaters, right? Ok… then let’s settle this over a best of three arm wrestling match, same place, a month from now. What say…?” By this time our spouses and friends had arrived and they all got very excited about the idea… Admittedly, it seemed like a no-contest. RC and I had trained together and his arm strength is phenomenal. I’ve seen him do biceps curls with his struggling-kicking wife while she held on to her shopping bags… not a mean feat I can assure you. RC looked at me with an expression that one might reserve for the most irritatingly infuriating child at a party who unfortunately happens to be the boss’ son. To humour me, he said: “fine, if you win I give up meat and if I win, you’ll start eating meat. Settled?” I balked, but under pressure from a raucous audience, agreed. RC sneered and almost inadvertently flexed those gnarly boulder-like things that sit atop his arm…

Driving back, I realised I might have bitten off more than I could chew. My schedule had thrown my yoga work-outs out of gear and I hadn’t seen the inside of a gym in ages. I needed to get stronger and in double quick time. So, I got back home and pored over books but found nothing that would make me fit and strong in time… Then I remembered the words of a vegan superman I once happened to meet… Sifu Zi, a Shaolin Master, he’d looked like a man who could run through a brick wall without batting an eye-lid and emerge unscathed. His whole being exuded power and vigour, but his face, true to the cliché, was aglow with the serenity of a sun-set by the sea… I had gone to interview him and if possible, learn a few moves.

Sifu Zi began by telling me, in excellent English, other than the odd missing ‘r’, that Shaolin Kung Fu owed its’ “owigins to India. Many years ago (in 527 AD, actually, as I discovered later), an Indian pwince called Da Mo (aka Sardilli) from the south of India awived at the Shaolin Temple to pweach Mahayana Budhism. At the temple he saw the pwiests were all weak and had twisted postures because all they’d do is sit and meditate... so Da Mo witweated to a cave for answers and nine yuhs later, weeturned with the secret teachings of the Yi Jin Jing (or, Muscle/ Tendon Changing Cassic). And that became the foundation of Shaolin martialarts as we know them today… yes from India… Today, the best Kung Fu mastaas use the Yi Jin Jing to become strong, healthy and invincible. Twaining with the Yi Jin Jing can make you vewy vewy powuhful vewy vewy fast. Old and young, boys and guhls, everybody can benefit from it… become healthy and stwong”. That day, I’d been very impressed, and proud of being an Indian, but then had forgotten all about it. But today I remembered those words… “very powerful, very fast”… just the thing I need, I thought.

I checked my notes from that day and tried to recollect some of the Yi Jin Jing moves he’d shown… I went to websites and book stores and finally found a book authored by a martial arts master Dr Yang, Jwing-Ming, which had a detailed account of the YJJ exercises. Book bought, I started my training, and with three weeks gone, I honestly feel stronger and fitter than I have in a long time. But RC isn’t sitting around on his well-muscled fundaments either. He’s been pushing some serious weight in the gym and the dance floor too. Not that he’s worried about losing, but he knows he carries on his shoulders the weight and expectations of all you meat-eaters and would rather not leave things to chance…

As for me, I’m in the battle for the sake of a good man’s soul, for by defeating him, I save him and thus, countless others. I’ve gotta go now… gotta prepare for battle, but if I win, here’s what’s in it for you… after I began training with YJJ, I’ve been able to lift heavier weights, sprint faster and have had marginal improvements in aerobic activities too… will it be good enough to win the battle for RC’s soul? I don’t know, but it really doesn’t matter for I have discovered a workout that was created by a vegan Indian, which in less than 30 minutes every day, offers strength and health, and as Dr Yang promises, great longevity and enlightenment(!!) too… it’s definitely worth experimenting with, folks… As for RC, he’s the first one I’m going to share this with… I know his heart’s too loving and kind to want to keep killing and eating other creatures, so in his heart of hearts, he wants me to win… and the rest of you, join a qigong class nearby that offers YJJ or if you can’t, then, like me find a good book and a good video and start your journey into strength health and enlightenment… Will keep you posted about the results…